What not to do at networking events
I’m a big fan of networking to build your business. I’ve written about how to get started with networking, what to expect when you go to a networking group, and here’s a list of which business networking groups to go along to in Brighton.
So here I want to go over a few things not to do when you’re trying to build your networks and make friends with people, especially when you’re at a business networking event.
While it’s great to follow up and say hi after you’ve met someone, it’s really not a good idea to send this “damning with faint praise” email.
“Just a short follow-up note to say what a pleasure it was to meet you at the BHCC Breakfast on Friday. Your work sounds interesting and I will bear you in mind for those of my clients who could be in need of your type of service.” I’m really not expecting any referrals from this guy, who has obviously sent the same email to everyone he met that morning, and possibly everyone he has ever met in his whole life, including his mum.
Then there are the people who “work the room” and collect as many cards as they possibly can, without taking any real interest in anyone, and certainly not making any friends. If you can meet 3 people and have a genuine conversation with each of them, then you’ve had a successful event. Networking is about making relationships, not collecting people like they were football stickers for your album.
And there’s the people who are talking to me, but make it clear that they’re desperately trying to find someone less boring. If you’re looking out for someone in particular at an event, why not ask the person you’re talking to help you find them. They might be able to introduce you, or help you out with this. And if I really am boring (I know I can go on about the joy of spreadsheets) and you want to move on, then just say “Shall we mingle?” Don’t just keep looking over your shoulder for someone better.
When someone offers you their card, please don’t refuse to take it, as I saw someone do to a friend of mine recently. This guy thought he was doing my pal a favour, as he didn’t want to take a card unnecessarily, but he ended up being ridiculed by me, and upsetting my friend. You can always throw it away later (although you never know if that person might be useful, so I wouldn’t) but there’s really no need to be rude. Think about how you might feel if someone did that to you – it wouldn’t feel good.
If you’re desperate to sell something, then please don’t be so very obviously desperate. The whole point of this networking thing is to make friends with people who may buy from you or encourage their friends to buy from you. If you rush round telling people about your product, or shoving leaflets at people, they will be disinclined to buy from you, even if you’ve got the cure for cancer ready to be dispensed.
Right, that’s enough ranting about poor behaviour for now…I shall be watching out for more dodgy techniques and will probably rant some more. Feel free to add your comments about what not to do at networking events.
Tags: marketing, networking, what not to do
June 24th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
Oh god – I hope that you never spot me doing anything dodgy!
The worst I saw was at a – being careful now – network event in West Sussex. This guy ran his own photography business and came in with a big pile of cards, clutched between both hands. I’m not going to tell you who – but I have remembered him..
He ran around, made no eye contact, certainly no conversation, pushed past people and thrust cards into our hands.
In the future, if I need a photograph taking I would employee anybody but that guy!
Perhaps the first rule to making a good impression is not to make a bad one
: – )
Phil
October 29th, 2010 at 1:40 pm
I am a naturally chatty and friendly person, so networking should be natural for me, but I often find it very frustrating, particularly when there is someone I wish to get to know, but they are standing in a group of people in animated discussion.
Is it rude to barge in and try to grab the attention of the person that you especially want to get to know? I believe so, so I often end up “lingering” at the side, not particularly interested in the conversation going on, but not wishing to be rude by trying to butt and in steer it onto something else that I want to talk about. (People do it to me at networking events, and I find it very annoying).
Then it starts to get embarrassing that I’m just “lingering” and not participating, so maybe I drift away and hope to come back later. Often, that later opportunity doesn’t come about. When the person I want to talk to becomes free, I may be in the middle of another conversation, and don’t want to dump the person or group and say, or imply, “Actually, I want to talk to that person more than I want to talk to you, so I’m going over to them.”
So then I leave the event frustrated that I didn’t use the chance to get to know the one or two people that I particularly wanted to get to know. Any tips?
November 1st, 2010 at 3:17 pm
If there’s someone in particular you want to meet, you could ask someone else to introduce you. At the Brighton Chamber we have special ambassadors who will do this for you, but you could always just ask the person you’re talking to to help out – it could become their mission for the evening.
Joining three people in conversation works well, as often the person you want to speak to can “peel off” and chat to you, without appearing rude to the others.
If you’ve been in a group of people with the person you want to meet, but haven’t had chance to speak to them directly, this does give you an excuse to get in touch with them after the event. So you could say “I really wanted to talk to you about X, but I didn’t get chance at the breakfast event this morning.” Much nicer than a cold call, as you’ve already established something in common.